Happyyyy Neww Yearrr everyoneee 🎊🎊
The wait is finally over and it’s time we start the ride all over again. LOL. I hope 2023 brings you lots of love, luck and light. May 2023 be as lucky as the sum of its digits. (not me trying to look smart)
Anywayyy, this year New Year celebration was amazing. It was not very sparkly or glittery, it was all about lots of people meeting, and having a great time together. New Year’s eve was all about fun with my sistah and my cousins who had come over. I went on a bike ride with my sis and we baked a cake, got chased by dogs (this was not fun), and enjoyed it so much.
The morning was all about going to the park in the morning, enjoying solitude, and thinking about the days gone by.
The afternoon was about doing what I love. I watched movies with my family and played music on my terrace while I painted flower pots. It was so fun having paint all over my hands after so long. Here is a little picture of the mess I made. Hehe, don’t judge. I know, it’s terrible.
And this is a click of what was remaining of — the cAkE.
I took my dog on a walk to the park later in the night and I talked to him about my hopes for 2023. He didn’t seem very interested though.
After my cousins left, I went to bed. Butttt how could I miss THE MOST IMPORTANT PART OF NEW YEAR. Reading my lettersssssss. So that’s what I did. I tucked myself in bed while I secretly pulled out my letters from the hide. I flipped through the pages of each one of them. They held so many emotions. I know this sounds so cliche but even the touch of every paper said something. Even my writing explained my emotions. The running handwriting showed my anger. The calligraphy depicted peace. Some pages had distorted ink due to my tears while some were crumpled showing my urge to throw them away. But I kept ’em. I kept all of ’em. Despite the fact that most of them held the most negative of my days, the others showed me how happy I was then. So, I kept ’em.
It is the feeling of fulfillment every time I read these letters that motivates me to write more. The feeling of not being in the same place anymore. The feeling of growth. However, at times, I still don’t feel right but the fact that I am in a better place than before is what these letters tell me. They make me feel so grateful for everything around me.
The fact that I am still surviving after losing, leaving, and being left. After falling, breaking down, and getting the pieces of myself in place again. After trusting, learning to never trust again, trying to trust again only to get betrayed again. After sharing, over-sharing, and then only sharing with the people who deserve to know. After all of my bad days and all of the good ones, it shows me that I am still surviving. For the best.
When you read your letters on New Year’s Eve with those fireworks outside, everything feels worth it.
I really recommend everyone to do the same. Even if you don’t have anything to say, just write down “I don’t know what to talk about today”. When you read that after some time, you’ll know how emotionless your days used to be then. 💀 (personal experience, speaking.)
I hold a lot of hopes for this year too. I wrote in my first letter of the year today about all that I want 2023 to be like. I don’t have major resolutions for this year, small ones but they’ll make a great difference to my life for sure.
- Be less altruistic and a little more selfish. Those who know me personally suggested I should do this so, here we go
- Learn to prioritise. Both people and work.
- Focus more on academic and co-curricular growth. I think I did a fairly good job with this in 2022. I focussed more on co-curricular than I did in 2021 and the back-end work that I did in 2021 bore me fruits in 2022. I got recognition for my work and talent but I want to do more of it this year ‘cuz BOARD EXAMS came in the way. Once they’re over. Junior year is waiting 🤍
- Get back to dancing. Though I did re-start dancing this year, I really want to give my practical and theory exam this year so that I move to Prarambhik-4 class. (It’s a level/class in Indian classical dance forms.)
- Be decisive. I can already foresee. This year is going to be about major decisions. I’d have to be very careful because each step might disappoint someone while it’d make someone else very happy. I really hope my decisions don’t negatively affect me or the people who care for me in any way. I have already hurt them enough.
2021 was about making mistakes and breaking down while 2022 was about learning from the mistakes, correcting them, and getting up again. 2023 should be all about healing and new beginnings. At least that’s what I hope for. 2022 has been a beautiful year with lots of memories. I wish 2023 is as good as my horoscope says it’ll be. LOL.
I wish you all a very happy new year again. May this year bring you the will and power to be able to meet your resolutions and lots of good memories to hold on to.
Until next time!!